Thursday, April 17, 2008
Thanks a Latke! The ANTM recap
Let’s get this out of the way first: Whitney knows what a potato latke is? Whitney? That little shiksa from Florida? What’s next? A little kugel with Fatima? Some kreplach with Dominique? A touch of kipper with Lauren? Color me impressed.
Okay, onto the show.
Ah, poor Stacey-Ann. As she stood there, on the hangar-turned-make-shift judging room, I felt for her.
First of all, she had recently discovered that being a social dynamo required more than marching up to people and blurting out “I’m from Miami!”
Second, she’s a pretty girl, but she looks nothing like any actual model I’ve ever seen (except for maybe a little bit like Saleisha around the eyes, but does that really count?). And there she is, standing next to gorgeous Fatima, who looks, well, like a lot like models I have seen before, specifically one who is married to David Bowie and whose name rhymes with “Scream on.”
And finally, in her lengthy pre-reveal preamble, Tyra practically spelled out how Stacey-Ann was going to lose, coming this close to saying, “And then I will reveal the blank photograph, indicating that Fatima is going overseas.”
The whole travels document drama was so totally contrived, don’t ya think? All of a sudden, on the very week that the girls embark on their trip “overseas” it suddenly dawns on Fatima that she needs her traveling documents? And the only time she can meet with the consulate just happens to conflict with the photo shoot, creating lots of 24-style clock ticking drama? Hmmm, Jack Bauer and I are both skeptical.
Other noteworthy tidbits:
•Will every one of Anya’s challenge wins require her to be completely nude?
•Did Dominique really just say “Jay Georgio” instead of “Jay Godfrey”? That was so random.
•Loved Anya’s dress.
•Whitney’s dress looked like a slutty Hefty bag.
•Agreed that Katarzyna needs to develop a personality. (Even a bad one—hey it works for Dominique.) But damn, the girl looks like a star.
•Drippy Lauren won CGoTW? Really, teenage America? (But that was genuinely instructive to see the difference between Lauren on the set—all fierce—and Lauren in the hangar—all knock-kneed and hunchy. What is UP with that chick?)
Show highlight? The whole “we’re flying in a private jet but you’re flying coach, bitches” moment from Tyra. Now THAT’s the Tyra I know and love.