Thursday, November 29, 2007

We Can’t Be Sisters All the Time: The ANTM recap

The big question: Who’s going to be Cover Girl of the Week now?
Yup, our little Heather is gone, and not a moment too soon, if you ask me.
The happiest I’ve seen Heather in weeks? When she gave that surprising little jaunty kick-step on her way out of the judging room.
She was clearly relieved—and to be honest, I was, too. To see her wandering the streets of Shanghai, looking up sadly at the skyscrapers, like some sort of gloomy Mary Tyler Moore, was more than I could take. (And what was up with Jeneh’s drive-by? Were they in a Compassion Free Zone?)
Indeed, it took some of the fun out the go-see episode, usually one of my faves of the season. (Chantal’s hot pink undies and Saleisha’s truly advanced suck-up skills were lone bright points.)
And I will say this: Next time I’m stuck in Baltimore traffic, I will repeat the following mantra, “I could be in Shanghai, I could be in Shanghai. . .” Because, man, that looked rough. (Speaking of Baltimore: You had to love Jaslene throwing the first pitch at the Oriole game in front of what can generously be called a “smattering” of fans. Guess we weren’t playing the Red Sox.)
Despite the traffic, somehow Saleisha and Bianca managed to make it back on time. And Bianca wins the big challenge: Her face floating on a barge in the harbor. Good times.
What’s up with Nigel being so pissy lately? Is being effortlessly gorgeous, talented, and rich really such a burden? Because once again, he seemed to get his knickers in a twist over Jeneh’s sarcasm. (Shades of his freak out over Caridee’s ill-advised “did you pull that pole out of your ass” joke from two seasons ago. Dude seriously can not take a joke.) I like Jeneh and don’t see anything wrong with her sense of humor. I still want her to win.
I just can’t get past Saleisha’s horrible hair (a failed attempt at making her "edgy"—she just looks like the Girl Next Door with a bad haircut) and the fact that Bianca looks like she wants to kill somebody in all of her photos. (Because the camera never lies?)
So if Jeneh is stuck with the “her personality sucks” edit (poor girl), maybe I will have to join Team Chantal. (Hey, beats being an Oriole fan.)
By the way, that opening question is a trick. I maintain that Heather will continue to win Cover Girl of the Week long after she’s gone, perhaps well into next season. As Tiffany Bosworth will undoubtedly write: “Heather is even fiercer in her absence than in her presence.”
Or something like that.

No comments: